Take Me Somewhere New
by trisanamcgraw
Summary: Songfic to Avril Lavigne's I'm With You Coda to Objects in Space, but with spoilers for Heart of Gold. Everyone needs to be with someone.


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Author's Note: This is a coda to "Objects in Space," but it also contains SPOILERS FOR "HEART OF GOLD," the (presently, but hopefully this will change soon) unaired episode whose script is available on **www.fireflyfans.net**** as well as other websites. Proceed at your own risk, but otherwise enjoy!**

Take Me Somewhere New

By Trisana McGraw

He hadn't budged from this spot in what felt like hours. It had started when he realized that this would be another sleepless night and had wandered around the upper catwalk, trying to force himself to focus on what he was supposed to do now. He'd leaned forward on the railing, resting his head on his arms, but even under the pretense of thinking Mal still couldn't pinpoint an answer to his problem.

__

I'm standing on the bridge

I'm waiting in the dark

I thought that you'd be here by now

Life had thrown him some pretty tough catches, but this one seemed the worst. Inara, leaving the ship — he couldn't let it happen. It had become almost a home to her — she'd told him that, once, and though he'd masked it with laughs and cheer, the very thought had scared and exhilarated him. This was his home, and for her to live here, in the same place as him, _with_ him — It seemed too good to be true.

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There's nothing but the rain

No footsteps on the ground

I'm listening but there's no sound

And it was. A week or so ago she'd announced her plan to leave, and, though they hadn't reached any planets that suited her tastes, she hadn't shown any signs of going back on her word.

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Isn't anyone trying to find me 

That's `cause she was too ruttin' stubborn. Kinda like him, actually. Neither would budge from their positions — she wouldn't stay, he wouldn't ask her to. Nandi had noticed that they were also similar in that neither liked complications in their lives.

Nandi. . . . It was after their visit to the Heart of Gold that Inara had announced her intentions of leaving, but Mal wondered whether she had planned to do so before that escapade. He'd wanted to expose his true feelings to her, but how was he to know that she would feel the same? And then, when it seemed as if they would finally be honest with each other, she had closed to him, maybe forever now that she would be gone.

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Won't somebody come take me home

They had talked little on the subject since her announcement a week ago. That fresh pain still lingered between them, strengthening as each day passed and both refused to cut straight through it and go to the heart of their problem.

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It's a damn cold night

Trying to figure out this life

He didn't need to hear the swish of her skirts to know that she'd come out on to the catwalk. He'd actually grown used to it, the two of them finding each other out here while the rest of the crew was otherwise occupied. They'd had several conversations out here, as their relationship had morphed into something more casual than a business arrangement but striving for friendship.

__

Won't you take me by the hand

Take me somewhere new

I don't know who you are, but I

Rather than approach him, she hung back in the safety of her shuttle's doorway. He thought he could feel her eyes on him, and he wondered what exactly she was thinking. Then new, almost inaudible sounds reached his ears: her light footsteps as she slowly walked toward him. Gathering her customary shawl over her shoulders, she leaned forward on the railing, not once looking at him.

__

I'm with you

Together yet so far apart they stared at the far wall, imagining the millions upon millions of stars, standing out as bright, stark points against the black, spreading away from them.

__

I'm with you

"I'm all alone. There's no one can help me now."

Her throat so tight it nearly choked off her words, her face already damp with tears yet burning with shame at the same time, she'd repeated the bounty hunter's words. There was nothing else she could do, not when he'd cornered her, not when she'd been tied up and forced to tell him where River was, just to keep herself alive.

His words still haunted her mind, so much that every time she closed her eyes, the image of his face was burned on to her retina. After an unsuccessful half hour of trying to sleep, she'd given up and instead begun roaming through _Serenity_. 

I'm looking for a place

Kaylee walked the corridors of the ship alone. With each step, she shook with something besides the cold. She wasn't sure where exactly she was going, but she needed to keep her mind on something other than Early and his skin-crawling voice that spoke such eerily calm threats.

I'm searching for a face

She knew the layout of _Serenity_ like the back of her hand, and she was surprised to find that her footsteps had led her to the passenger dorm. The realization suddenly hit her that she didn't want to be here.

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Is anybody here I know

The shame from giving away River's location to Early swept over her like a wave, and, like a torrent of water, left her shivering. What in the `verse was wrong with her? She couldn't go to the Tams, not after she'd let both of them down.

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`Cause nothing's going right

And everything's a mess

And no one likes to be alone

The door slid open with a gentle _swish_, and a soft voice said, "Their claws sink deep into flesh and scar it."

"River!" Kaylee struggled to keep her voice down, remembering that Simon was sleeping in the bunk next door. "What are you doing up?" She hadn't expected to see River, but now she felt a tingling relief spread through her. She wasn't alone, it turned out.

"Walking around only postpones the nightmares," the girl replied instead. Kaylee marveled at how quickly River could look into her mind and pick out the problem. Simon was right; she really was gifted.

"At least it keeps them away," Kaylee answered softly.

River nodded once, then shook her head. "They loosen their grip, but they never fully release you." Looking at her, Kaylee thought, _She probably speaks from experience._

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Isn't anyone trying to find me

River placed her thin, pale hand in Kaylee's callused one. The younger woman's skin was as soft as flower petals and cool to the touch, so much that it startled Kaylee.

__

Won't somebody come take me home

River looked back at her, her eyes kind. "Come with me," she said, and Kaylee couldn't find a reason to refuse.

__

It's a damn cold night

"I've been doing a lot of thinking," Mal spoke, breaking the silence and causing Inara to slowly turn her head to regard him. He continued to stare straight ahead. "With you gone, we're gonna have to find a new way to get that respectability' that's helped us get a lot of our jobs done."

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Trying to figure out this life

Inara ducked her head again, but this time Mal turned her way. "Thing is, we're not gonna find it. Nothing will ever be like what you gave us — what you gave me." Blue eyes locked on brown and refused to let go; he couldn't let go of her, not now, not ever. "I'm not just talkin' `bout everything that comes with bein' a Companion; you became a part of the family on this boat, and that's not to be taken lightly."

Her eyes were wide, and she swallowed but didn't speak. The tension in the air was thick enough for Jayne to slash with his knife, but Mal let the silence stretch as he searched her eyes. She seemed to be waiting for something more, and he didn't know what else he could offer her.

__

Won't you take me by the hand

Take me somewhere new

No; there was one more thing. "I ain't that good with words," Mal said softly, "but I know that when I gotta say somethin', I don't let it go unsaid. Stay here. Don't leave."

He saw something flicker behind her eyes, and then she lowered her lashes. In the darkness he missed the glimmer of liquid in the corners of her eyes.

__

I don't know who you are, but I

He was out of words, so he reached out his hand and tentatively placed it over hers. As had happened before, when he'd touched her split lip, her fingers curled around his.

__

I'm with you

I'm with you

Why is everything so confusing

River sat beside her on the couch outside the Tams' rooms, and suddenly the words came rushing out. "River, I didn't mean to tell him. I never wanted him to hurt you, but he was gonna — kill —" Her eyes had begun to sting again, and now her throat closed on the rest of her words, yet she tried again to speak, with no success.

__

Maybe I'm just out of my mind

River placed her hand on Kaylee's cheek and whispered, "Already forgiven. Not your fault."

Kaylee shook her head wordlessly, unable to believe that forgiveness could come so easily.

__

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah . . .

"What's going on?" a sleepy male voice demanded. Both girls turned their heads to see Simon leaning heavily on the doorframe. Dressed in a shirt and loose pants, he regarded them with confusion, his features contorted slightly from the pain of having to support some of his weight on his injured leg.

"Shouldn't be up," River murmured, standing up from the couch as he took several halting steps toward them. She grabbed his hands and allowed him to lean some of his weight on her frail body as she led him over to the couch. Still sitting, Kaylee started to rise so he could take a seat, but Simon beckoned her to sit down next to him once he was situated.

"Kaylee, what are you doing here?" he asked, and the mechanic felt the blood rush to her face. Now she was embarrassed for not only having childish nightmares, but for also disturbing Simon when he should be sleeping.

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It's a damn cold night

It was River who supplied an answer. "Voices in her head, telling her what she doesn't want to hear. Like ghosts, they haunt her, all through the day and even in the night, when they thrive on darkness." Her brother looked completely perplexed, and River continued, "Jubal Early is his name, scaring little girls is his game."

"Kaylee?" Simon asked again, reaching out a hand to her. "Did the bounty hunter hurt you?" She grasped his larger hand tightly, grateful for the comfort, and shook her head in reply.

"No, he didn't hurt me . . . but he scared me plenty. I'm sorry," she whispered, even more ashamed at hearing her words.

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Trying to figure out this life

"Don't be," Simon assured her in a soft, warm voice, tugging her over. She resettled herself so that her arm leaned against his shoulder. River sat on his other side, curled against the sofa cushions.

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Won't you take me by the hand

"Do you want me to stay here with you?" Simon asked Kaylee.

She shook her head. "You don't have to, Simon."

"That's not the point," he told her. "Do you want me to stay?"

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Take me somewhere new

How could she refuse him, when he stared at her like an endearing little brown-eyed puppy? "I . . . I do. But you should go back to sleep . . ." she protested weakly.

"To be honest, I can't really sleep," he admitted sheepishly, "what with my leg. . . ." A slight grimace of pain passed over his features, and he cleared his throat. "I'm here, if it helps."

__

I don't know who you are, but I

She felt a small smile — her first real one in days — twitch at her lips, and she wondered what use there was in fighting such a sweet, gentlemanly offer. "It does," she whispered.

There was a fleeting cool touch on her arm, and Kaylee looked up into River's wide, dark eyes. "Power in numbers can fight the dark," she proclaimed softly, and Kaylee nodded.

__

I'm with you

I'm with you

Take me by the hand

Take me somewhere new

Right now, this was the only place she wanted to be. Already she could feel her fears slipping away, forced to the back of her mind by the drowsy warmth beginning to descend upon her. 

River spoke up, "Doctor is a caretaker. He makes people feel better with medicine." Simon looked thoughtfully at his sister, who only smiled knowingly and continued, "But love is a stronger medicine. And we have both."

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I don't know who you are, but I

Kaylee thought of all the times that Simon had taken care of her — since the first days they had known each other, when he'd tended her gunshot wound — and realized that River was right. Hearing the second part of River's statement, she bit her lip and glanced away, but when she looked back up, Simon and River were both smiling at her.

__

I'm with you

Kaylee found a blanket for them, and the three curled up together on the couch. Resting her head on Simon's shoulder and closing her eyes, Kaylee thought that it was moments like these — being with someone who cared for her, and she for them, times when words didn't have to dominate the situation, when a simple gesture could say it all — that made up the family of _Serenity_, a family she was grateful to be a part of.

__

I'm with you

Take me by the hand

Also mirroring the time when he had touched her face, Inara drew away almost immediately. She tightened her shawl around her shoulders, as if chilled, aware of Mal's eyes lingering on her.

__

Take me somewhere new

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"I'm a big girl; just tell me." He'd let her know his feelings, so why did she still feel something blocking her from returning the sentiment?

__

"None of it means a damn thing." With Inara, it did matter. It mattered more than a lot of things had in his life.

"I hope that helps," Mal said, and she thought she could hear the strain in his voice.

Inara turned back around and faced him head-on. "It does," she answered softly, but she didn't know what else to say, what real answer she could give him now.

"I'll see you in the morning," she whispered, and that was her cue to retreat to her shuttle to contemplate her choices.

Mal watched her go, feeling an almost tangible pain in his chest. He wanted to see her every morning, every day, every night — but some things took time. It had taken a whole year for them to admit to some sort of mutual feeling; chances were he'd have to wait a bit longer before revealing his true self to her, and she to him.

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I don't know who you are, but I

He'd willingly wait longer, but he just wanted to know for sure that she'd be waiting right beside him.

__

I'm with you

I'm with you

I'm with you


End file.
